My last entry here was entitled ‘Tripping’. It was a fun and jolly swipe at the completely irrational fear* I have of ever again getting on a plane and visiting a foreign country.
* I would argue that ‘climbing inside a metal tube, strapped to gallons of highly explosive fuel and propelled to several thousand feet, all whilst in the company of a couple of hundred complete strangers’ is not necessarily irrational. But hey ho, semantics.
As stated in that piece, unfortunately my passport renewal did not get lost in the post, for which I’d paid extra, so I’m running out of iron-clad reasons to not go through with this. Although I am researching crimes to commit that may get me locked up until my passport expires, literally iron-clad. But a crime that will not make me look bad as a person. An act for the greater good. That kind of thing. I would be grateful for any suggestions.
My comment section on that post forced me to reveal how much I sweat the small stuff. It’s a survival technique based on distraction and control. I’ve never sweated the big stuff. Because I can’t control it. I just try and trust the Universe to get me to the other side in one piece. I may not know how that will happen, but I can distract myself along the way by getting in a tizzy over something obscenely trivial. You know that saying; ‘Can’t see the wood for the trees’? The wood is overwhelming. Let’s focus on picking up all the broken twigs and cleaning all the little leaves to make them shiny. Oh, that little leaf is pointing in the wrong direction and RUINING EVERYTHING!
A peek inside my head there.
Here’s me Not Sweating The Big Stuff;
- Flight cancellation. Bummer.
- Accommodation double-booked. Unfortunate.
- Return flight grounded due to Brexit happening whilst we’re away. Meh.
- Loss of luggage. Ah.
- The weather ruins our trip. Well, clouds will be clouds. Their rain. Their parade.
Here’s me Sweating The Small Stuff;
- Apparently it’s impossible to get on the wrong plane. So now I’m super worried about that, because the more improbable something is to happen the more likely it is to happen to me.
- Could I accidentally use an offensive hand gesture just by ordering cake?
- The accommodation hosts, whether that be a hotel or something that rhymes with Mon Cher, Sea & Brie (all I want in a holiday really), will know where we live. And for exactly how long we’ll be away. It’d only take one phone call and their crime syndicate associates in the UK will be breaking into our home, frightening our cat, alarming our cat-sitter and stealing stuff from our freezer.
- The likelihood of mispronouncing *insert foreign word for vegetarian here* and finding myself with half a goat to eat. And feeling ‘visitor from abroad’ obliged to eat it.
- Our house deciding to collapse into a heap of bricks whilst we’re away.
Obviously I’ll leave it to you to decide which, from the small stuff list, falls under the category of ‘distraction’ or ‘control’. Or perhaps you feel there’s enough evidence to add a sub-category of ‘crackers off-her-rocker twit, flapping around like a headless chicken, wasting time and energy creating a whirlwind of chaos out of nothing’.
Like I said; you decide.
The Lockwood Echo 
I am with you on sweating the small stuff!!! Hysterical and wonderful post!!!!
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Thankyou! Maybe we should start as Small Stuff Sweat Club? Sounds like a cute exercise class, but really it’s anxious introverts worrying about whether they should stack their CDs by title or artist, even though they can’t listen to a CD as they’ve had their electricity cut off so should be more concerned about that! For example 😉
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Very funny post, at least you can laugh about it! I too get very anxious over things others don’t seem to think about.
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It’s really burying your head in the sand, but kidding yourself you’re being busy and proactive! The positive side is, a problem/issue has been scrutinised and sometimes the detail is crucial. Glad it provided some giggles. Thankyou for reading .😊
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Hahaha. 😀 Great post.
Just remember that commercial flying is the safest form of transit. Truly. (You can look that up.) No sweating. Well, maybe. Those seats ARE close together and there are a lot of them. 😉
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When I flew to Australia, as we walked to our allocation at the back of the plane, my travelling companion commented that we had really good seats. Naive me asked why. ‘Because you don’t hear of planes crashing into mountains backwards’ 🥺. We won a bottle of champagne on the way back (by guessing the combined age of the crew). But I got it in my head that it was a prize saying ‘well done, you never have to do this again!’ Thankyou so much for your comment. It really helps having a pilot ‘on board’. Yes, it really helps having a pilot on board. Note to self; don’t get on a plane without one!
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You’re welcome. 😊
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Oh GOD you’ve just reminded me that my Passport expired in March. And my drivers licence. I hate paperwork! xx
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Get to it! I did my passport online, but had to print it off to send with photo, but I think newer renewals can be done online with a digital selfie. Or maybe that’s for renewals whilst passport is still valid. Either way, renewal was way easier than first time application. My passport expired 11 years ago! Good luck 🙂
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Dang, I’m really worried about my house collapsing to a pile of bricks now. And it’s not even made of bricks!
This probably won’t help, but I’m really looking forward to reading any and all posts that may result from your trip. 😉
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Ha! Sorry about that. Hope your house is ok 😉. Well, I had a mini-hurdle to clear before we could commit to anything, but today that hurdle was cleared; the trip is ON! Not till later in the year, but we are going to book it this weekend so that we can’t back out 😉. We always try to make the most out of anything we do, even if it doesn’t go to plan, so I’m already looking forward to sharing the tale. Thankyou so much for the support. 😊
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Sweating the small stuff should be an Olympic event, and we should be on that team. We would dominate. I’m trying to think of anything I am more skilled at than sweating the small stuff, but nothing is coming to mind.
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I hear ya!
Normal Sensible Adults: Is my chosen accommodation in a safe neighbourhood? How will I get there from the airport? What guarantees are in place to protect my booking?
Me: (scouring magnified photos of the interior) What does the loo look like? Is there a kettle?
But it takes faith, bravado and resilience to not sweat the big stuff so we should get extra points for that. 😉
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Hilarious! As a fellow vegetarian, I share your concern about a simple mispronunciation leading to a horrifying feast of dead goat. 😛
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Surely a green ‘V’ is universal language for ‘nothing with a face’? I’ll have Google Translate on standby, just in case. I usually just point to stuff on menus anyway if there’s a risk of mispronunciation! Thankyou for dropping in and for your comment. Good to know I’m not alone in my fears. 😉
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I’m exactly the same way–I can only enjoy the trip once the plane is in the air and there’s no way to back out of it. Up until then, I’m a basketcase. Also, I’m deathly allergic to shellfish and try explaining that in ANY language–usually I just mime choking and put my epipen on the table:-)
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Did you do your choking mime with lobster claw hands, cos I can totally picture that sketch! You’ve hit the nail on the head re; the backing out. Applying for my passport renewal was a MASSIVE hurdle, because I knew that negated my biggest excuse. And we’ve now booked and paid for a trip, so we can’t back out. Although it’s a few months away, I’m talking about it or looking up something every day to normalise it and take the Big Deal out of the Big Deal! Ridiculous really, we’re only going for 5 nights! Thankyou so much for sharing on here, it’s really helped me knowing others are ‘Feeling The Fear & Doing It Anyway’!
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Not even going to share the destination you chose? Ask your neighbors to keep an eye on your property. Choosing someone to stay there could be a game in itself… if you are positive a crime syndicate will attack your place, invite someone you really don’t like to housesit…. or if you have a nosy neighbor invite them to stay and leave “shocking secrets” throughout your home. the possibilities are endless
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I like your wicked mind Grace. Definitely food for thought there ;). We have someone who looks after our cat and house whenever we’re away, so I’m sure we’ll be the first to know if it does randomly fall down. Fingers crossed though! We’re keeping our location secret for a few reasons;
So we don’t jinx it.
If it goes wrong or it’s not what we hoped for then we only have ourselves to blame, rather than people sharing their recommendations in good faith but for it turn out to be not our cup of tea.
It’ll be surprise for family when we send our postcards. As none of them know where either!
Also, as it’s our first time abroad together, we want it to be ‘our thing’, warts and all! We want to ‘discover’ the place for ourselves.
But WE ARE BOOKED. You’ll just have to wait till Autumn to find out where ;).
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All excellent reasons not to share! My kiddos have raved about this burger place Kuma’s forever. I’m not much of a restaurant burger eater, but gave it a try…they all stared at me waiting for a response while I tasted it….. eh it’s a burger…and a damn expensive one at that. I will still be here in autumn to find out!!!
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We are SO much alike. I obsess over the tiniest little things. Okay, a few of the big things as well (climate change! oh my god!) but mostly things which don’t really matter in the end. Say, perhaps we could go to the same therapist and get a group discount. Of course, much of my therapy involves alcohol, not sure of your thoughts on that… 😉
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Group Therapy Discount, now that’s an avenue worth investigating. Though I think they call it Bulk Buy at the Off Licence (Liquor Store) ;). I do worry about the big stuff, right there with you on climate change, and if I think I can do something about, I will do my best. But the cold sweats are always small stuff related. I must’ve spent an hour yesterday (work-time, so not technically wasted) looking up the whole ‘flying with liquids’ issue. Now, I’m happy about what I can and can’t take, but I could not find the answer to the simple question ‘Can I decant, and does my ‘decanted into’ container have to have its size stated on it’? So, sleepless night over THAT, but not at all concerned with how will we get from the airport to our accommodation. There’ll be a bus. We’ll wing it. I have a co-dependent relationship with the Small Stuff. I think I would disintegrate if there wasn’t minutiae to distract and occupy my energy and focus. 🙂
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Bravo, just think, with all the sweating you are doing, you will be 2 sizes smaller and the bloody plane seats won’t strangle you. Good strategy there.
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Ooh, putting that in the ‘on the plus side’ column! And surely palpitations are a good work out for the heart. I’m literally getting fitter just by worrying. Thankyou for popping in and offering your positive spin. 🙂
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😂 I love your posts so much they are so entertaining.
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Thankyou! Big smiley face and happy dance going on over here. Glad to be of service. 😊
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You are definitely me. My current pet concern is that the stove in my new apartment will spontaneously combust. I don’t even have a gas installation done yet. But that’s totally likely, right? >.<
Here's to us, who get anxious about the small stuff all the time! Now excuse me while I go get anxious about something in this comment being offensive! 🙂
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I seemed to have missed this comment! So I’m sorry for the very late reply! To reassure you, there is nothing offensive in your comment ;). I think sweating the small stuff is a useful attribute. It means nothing is overlooked, so your gas is safe, you are safe, therefore making the world safer :).
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No problem at all! It happens to me too every now and then! 🙂 And thanks, I was mostly joking on that instance, but it is a concern I usually have when I talk to people. And also thanks for helping me reframe my mindset on my worries. It is true that it helps keep everything safer. Hope you’re having a great week!
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Why don’t we just share some good old laughter instead?
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Laughter is the cure all. Certainly helps deal with the stress. Great medicine. 😊
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